You choose what you ask your body to do.
Sometimes you ask too much. Most of the time, I ask too little.
Why? I suppose that there’s a part of me that’s afraid of failing. I don’t know why. I have the highest degree attainable in my field, I’ve recently won awards for my two most recently published books, I’ve finished four Sprint triathlons, a 3k and a 5k (after never running until a few years ago), I’ve gotten tenure and promoted as high as our system allows.
Last week I read in someone’s blog (I forget whose, I apologize) that for your first triathlon, you should never be the person that shows up and has excuses before even starting. Sadly, I was probably that person. I wanted it “out there” that if I failed, here’s why. I had set myself up for failure before even beginning. On a happy note, I finished the Triathlon and I was not last. Two of my most important goals.
That experience gave me the courage to know that I could. And I came back stronger two years later. Every year, I hope to be stronger.
Sometimes I find myself saying, “Jeez, you’re almost 50, aren’t you too old to get better? Hasn’t your time passed?” Then I remember a photograph of two women, both in their 80s (that some other delightful person posted). One bent over a walker, gnarled fingers clutching the rubber, white knuckled, beaten and worn by the years. The other woman, fit as a 40-year-old who had run her whole life. The caption implied that our life choices now help decide which body we will inhabit in 40 years. It made quite the impression on me.
So, I pushed myself a little harder today in the pool. I warmed up with about 200 yards, then did 100 kick, 100 pull (neither of which I had done for eons), then 4×50 speed sets. I ended up with 800 yards, my short day. Next time, with my arm feeling a LOT better, I plan to do over 1,000 yards–I am way ahead of my training for the O’Rourke, but that’s okay. I need to get more pool time, I had a month off due to the injury.
So, thanks bloggers, for reminding me to dig deeper. Trust myself and to trust the process.
I am going to do the Frosty Bike Ride (February, 15 miles). I am going to do the State Farm 5k (March). I am going to do the O’Rourke Sprint (April). I am going to do the Omaha Women’s Triathlon. I am going to do the Olathe Sprint (September). I am also going to do a Danskin or SheRox Sprint (June or July). AND, I am going to do the Havelock 3k; and, yes, I am going to do a 10k this fall.
There. It’s out there. Gotta do it. 
Brilliant stuff. Your goals sound fantastic.
Fear of failure is normal. For some of us, it’s why we’re successful: the fear drives us to push our limits. Sure, it also makes us feel anxious and tired but without it, we might just rest on our laurels. The trick is to recognise it and push through
. Which is what you are doing
Thanks! Here’s hoping (and Tri-ing!)
Life is only like Alzheimer’s if we slow down long enough for it to take us. I remember reading somewhere (I do remember where), that my dad won’t ever be as good as he is today, again. You and I are the opposite. I don’t ever have to be as slow as I was yesterday, again. Just a thought. Good luck sunshine.
What a great thought, my friend. What a great way to start my week.
. Thanks!
Failure is not starting! You are doing great!!
You are inspiring, and have an excellent point!
“Jeez, you’re almost 50, aren’t you too old to get better? Hasn’t your time passed?” I’ll be hitting 50 this year too! I am in better shape today that I was at 30 or maybe even since high school ! Keep on digging and climbing, who knows what we can do with the days we have. What a great life we have Sandra.
Yay for us! Thanks for your stories! I was always in perfect shape until knee surgery. Then I think when my marriage started giving out, I sort of started giving up (just a few years into a 17.5 year marriage). Excuses are for losers, and I earned that title. Then. I am a way different person now–yay!! I love my life and all of my bloggy friends!!! Y’all are like my guardian angels.